It has been long since I last updated my condition regarding Hodgkin’s lymphoma. Well, currently I am still undergoing treatment, and have already completed 5 cycles of chemo. So I am now left with just 1 more cycle of chemo, just 2 more times and I would finish this whole treatment. Honestly speaking, it is a mix of feelings.. feeling.. Excited? Not really.. Happy? Not exactly either.. I don’t really know what kind of feelings I am carrying. But I can only say that I am glad that so far everything is still considered quite okay. It is just that.. knowing that there are 2 more times waiting for me to go through.. puts me off because of all the discomfort I have to go through. At the same time, I know I can’t do much about the discomfort I have to go through.. I can only face it. and when it is over, I tell myself, congrats, you passed another round of chemo…I do look forward to the end of the treatment but it doesn’t excite me.. Maybe because it would stir up anxiety in me.
Anyway, for my 8th, 9th and 10th chemo, same old same old. I just kept vomiting. Sometimes fever too while chemo is ongoing. And then after chemo ended, I would be really tired.. Followed by some pain or discomfort at the IV plug site for a few days, few days after chemo. Only exception for the 10th chemo is that, I caught flu after chemo. Had runny and blocked nose, as well as sore throat. Thankfully there was no fever. Gave a visit at the hospital and all is done with 5 days of flu medication. but what was weird was that, on the day of 10th chemo, before my chemo started, I was having fever.. I don’t really know why tho.. anyway, the nurses called my doctor to ask for permission to proceed chemo despite my fever or what not. and my 10th chemo proceeded. While having my 10th chemo, because of the side effects of the drugs and maybe because I wasn’t really feeling well, my fever shot up to as high as 40°C. Thankfully after taking panadol, my temperature starts to decrease.
Now, I just have 2 more times of chemo to go. Rather than feeling excited, I think I would just not think much about it and let time pass. Doing other things and exercises so that time won’t just pass like some running tap water LOL! Just making this boring process a little more meaningful.
OH!! on a side note, I think my hair is growing!!! Thats one good news about it! I think maybe because after my 8th chemo, my white blood count (WBC) has been increasing. Although after my 10th chemo, because I caught a flu so my WBC decreased again. However, it was not so low such that I had to take the WBC booster shot YAYYY! 🙂
ps. would love to end this post with a personal encouragement “Smile, because you are BRAVER than you think you are 😉 “